The Door is Wide Open

When young children begin exploring boundaries at the age of one or two, they frequently hear the word "no." "NO, you can't have a cookie before dinner. NO, you can't eat dirt. NO, you can't ride Fido around the living room." Parents tell their children "no" because they want to protect the health of their offspring and teach them the boundaries of normal behavior.

Unfortunately, as children grow they also develop limiting beliefs about their own abilities. Some of these beliefs come from authority figures: "NO, you're not very good at math. NO, you'll never get into a good college with those grades." Other beliefs originate from feelings of inadequacy: "NO, I'll never amount to anything. NO, she would never want to go to the dance with someone like me."

By the time children reach adulthood, most have deep-seated beliefs about their personal limitations. To avoid the possibility of looking foolish, many adults live in self-constructed comfort zones designed to insulate them from negative experiences. They rarely, if ever, explore the boundaries of their abilities. But in the process of trying to avoid failure, a large number have failed to find fulfillment. The walls of protection around their lives are, upon closer examination, prison cells.

Here's a secret for anyone in this situation: the door is wide open.

It may seem easier to live a quiet, protected life than to try something new. But if previous efforts have failed to produce lasting happiness, if significant change is necessary but unexplored, perhaps it is time to say "YES." "YES, I can change. YES, I can make a difference. YES, I can improve my life and experience success. YES, I can!"

Waiting for someone's permission to start pursuing a better life will probably result in a very long wait. Even when others say "no," new possibilities for happiness may appear when you say "YES."