Abuse

Toxic.

Broken.

Destructive.

Yet you keep going back.

It's possible to be addicted

to something that isn't a substance.

People, habits, thinking patterns.

You call it loyalty,

but really it's dysfunction.

Knowing you need to leave

but not knowing how.

Walking away when you should be running.

Losing yourself,

Losing your mind,

Losing all concept of free will.

Forgetting

the life you used to know.

Believing

you deserve nothing better.

Shattered sense of self,

submitting to keep the peace,

saying someday he'll change

maybe this is the last time he'll hit me

He's a good man

Just carrying a heavy load

He used to be kind

He'll be kind again.

Lies.

Venom.

Self-deception.

There is nothing that justifies abuse,

and the pattern begun won't end.

Leave.

Now.

Call whatever friends you have left

And get as far away from him as you can.

There is fear in leaving

But the greater danger is staying.

Remember the joy you used to feel?

You are not undeserving

in spite of what he says,

in spite of how he treats you.

You've done things you regret

We all have

But you don't deserve this hell.

And no one can free you

Until you decide to free yourself

Escaping both the situation

And the prison of the mind

You helped him build

Piece by miserable piece.

You were made for more than this.

You are loved more deeply than you know.

A new world awaits.

Step into the light.